Dear lord, I’ve started a podcast!
Hey guys!
So, I thought I would dive a bit deeper into the why..
Why on Earth am I baring my soul on a podcast where I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing?!! This is so I can give you an idea on what the process or journey looked like for me as this new project of mine sure did trigger some hidden fears and limiting beliefs. So I hope in me sharing the journey, and being honest, you can find some helpful tools that you can apply in your life too.
So there you go- another confession- I hands down don’t really know what I’m doing, I have absolutely no idea how to do a podcast, I have had no experience with mics, or editing or talking out loud to myself- the whole thing is such a foreign notion to me! I have caught myself many, many times these last few months completely stricken with fear and questioning everything! Yet, I know deep down that this is all just another leap of faith, where I follow my intuitive guidance and figure it all out as I go along!! And well, I’ve gotten this far where I now know how how to record, edit and post- not so bad?!
Now, its important for me to be real with you guys. I never want to pretend like I know what I’m doing all of the time, that I, or my spirit guides, have all the answers. As the truth is I don’t and they don’t- and absolutely no one in this world will have the answers for you- except for you!
So that is why it is important for you to do your own work, your own research, and to use your discernment when it comes to any new information or teachings. Explore and try out what works for you and feels right for you, we are all different and learn in different ways. And that’s perfect, that’s exactly how its supposed to be. There is never any “one way works for all” when it comes to anything in life. So in exploring any new content, take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. And as always, follow your intuition is my best advice.
Previously in my last episode I had given you just a little insight of my journey into my self discovery, to awakening to my energetic gifts as well as the magic of the Law of Attraction. But I wanted to talk more about the reason why my guides want me to come out of the closet- so to speak! I also wanted to share with you how this podcast came about- as there was definitely quite the time period where I was in the dark, where I had absolutely no idea what adventure the universe was sending me on this time, but yet I followed the clues and hints that ultimately has led me here! I am hoping that by sharing my story, you can find some inspiration or some solace in whatever crazy life adventure you find yourself in!
That’s one thing I really want to expand on here, all my life I have had little and big uncanny ‘adventure’s’ in which the universe likes to send me on! I know this is going to sound a little weird, but its true. I have had them all my life, at all different times and stages. These adventure’s come about when I’m in the flow and feeling my most magnetic self, but then sometimes when I’m in some rough situations and when I’ve needed help, and sometimes these little adventures with spirit or the universe have come through when I’ve been too stagnant or stuck.
My adventures usually start out with some little intuitive pings or nudges, or synchronicities which capture my attention. I then usually follow through with following my pings- and they usually lead me to something magical, where I am reminded of the magic of the universe and where I learn some neat lesson or gain some wisdom. But the key element in following these adventure’s is to be in the present, and notice or observe when the universe is trying to get your attention!
And so that is what 2020 was for me- another adventure from the Universe!
Here I was going along just fine- running a successful clothing and jewelry business, always pushing it to the next level- and making more money than I ever imagined or intended it to have made. Not only that, I had created my business and operated it in a way where I would have a lot of time and freedom than I did before. In Summer time I would only do one market a week, leaving lots of time for my hobbies like dirt biking, gold panning, hiking and camping. It really was the perfect lifestyle business for me, making money whilst having freedom for the endless stream of hobbies and adventures that are to be had in these coastal mountains! It wasn’t all fun and games however, in the Fall I would work super hard in production doing 16 hour days in preparation my Christmas Art Shows which were so fun but so much work. After that, and after complete burn out, I would have 4 months off in Winter time where I would snowboard, snowshoe, read or travel, it also allowed me time to spend usually a good month or so in Australia- getting some much needed sunshine and spending time with friends and family. Overall, life was great, I had used the art of holding focus and manifesting to create what to others would have been seen as impossible or too hard to do. And hey, I was proud of myself, I had gone against the grain and had created a business that worked for me, that was my passion and I was living my most awesome and authentic life!
But in 2020 I had an intuitive feeling that things were going to change.. I didn’t know what or how, good or bad- but I just knew.. I started having thoughts about what I would do if I couldn’t run my business, or what other job or career I would like to have if I wasn’t running Re:creation. These thoughts seemed to have come from no where, and I wasn’t sure why I was having them but still I didn’t think too much about them at the time.
I remember it was December 2019 when I sensed I had a new guide coming in. I started to feel my intuitive pings going off, something was changing.. I remember thinking oh gosh, spirit hasn’t sent me on an adventure in quite some time, as.. well.. I’d really been actively trying to ignore them and live a more ‘normal’ life.
I’ve had only just a couple of different spirit guides before, so I knew or had a feeling when a new one would come in. I will go into more detail about how I sense them in a later episode, but I have found that when I have had a new guide come in, its usually also when I am needing to level up in some way- or when I need to learn some new lessons.
So, I was so exhausted from having the busiest summer I’ve ever had- for my business and from all of the outdoor camping adventures in the mountains. In Canada, Summer time isn’t very long, so my husband and I spend as much time being outside and doing all our fun activities as we can! So I went from a busy fun Summer into a busy 16 hour production days in Fall, then straight after that I was travelling around- going from Art show to Art show each week at Christmas time.
Thinking back to that time, I was basically running on empty.. Or coffee.. Lots of coffee!
Anyway, during this busy time I could also sense spirit with me, but this was a new and different energy.. I could feel it was a new guide coming in but I was just too busy to deal with it! My poor new guide, I didn’t make time to find out who this guide was and what they wanted to talk about as I was too busy trying to live life on Earth like everyone else!
It wasn’t until the new year, when I started getting messages that were a lot clearer and came through in very strong thought form and in my dreams. I remember one day I was in my craft room, playing around with new jewelry designs, when I suddenly got the thought message of “You need to buy supplies now as you wont be able to get them later this year”.
I remember it was said with such urgency- and I knew it wasn’t my thought as I was just playing around and being creative, watching Ru Paul’s drag race and just having a grand old time! I thought the message was perhaps from my grandmother who had passed years ago, as I sometimes ask for her spirit for help when it comes to picking fabrics and coming up with new designs as she always had an eye for designs and was a seamstress herself. But it didn’t feel like her energy.. This was new.
But then more and more messages about how things were going to change this year came in, always subtle and always in a gentle loving way. I’m not going to lie- it was a bit weird for me as my logical/ego mind just couldn’t understand how?! Things were great, I had my entire year of shows and collection’s lined up!
So I didn’t really think much of it..
That was in January 2020, there I was actively was trying to ignore this new spirit guide who was gently warning me that change was coming. It wasn’t until I went to Australia for my annual visit, where I could really sense I had a new guide or spirit with me. I had my first vision of him come in one night when I was meditating, just a gentle appearance and I felt a strong and loving presence. But, as I was on holiday I told him to leave me alone and that I just didn’t want to deal with him now. Then, fast forward to the first lock down of 2020 and when I received my concussion, and boy oh boy was my new guide ever excited to finally have me sitting still and meditating for 6 hours a day- ha!
As I had lots of time, and couldn’t do anything else but lay in complete silence I decided to finally chat with him. I never used to be able to visualize very well in my meditations , but through practice I taught myself how to see things more clearly using a combination of both my imagination and my feelings. He introduced himself to me as a huge giant wizardly kind of looking man,with large hands and was so so tall. Or perhaps an even better description would be an Alchemist, if you will, as he wasn’t so mystical looking like you would imagine a wizard to be. I’ve always had a fascination with Alchemy, but now I had my own alchemist to talk to! He is very gentle, he also doesn’t talk a whole lot, but when he does he is very to the point and clear -no fuss- just how I like it.
The funny thing is, in the past I hadn’t ever asked for my guides names as I just never thought it was important or necessary- as I knew them as an energy. I would sense my guides through visually seeing them (clairvoyant) in my meditations, feeling them (clairsentient), hearing them (clairaudient) or communicated with them via thought form (claircognizant). So I never really bothered with names, as I never had a use for a name or to label anything as they weren’t physical.
But there was a string of synchronicities that had happened where it was clear he wanted me to ask his name. I remember because it started when I would tell my friends about him, that he was saying some pretty profound things and was helping me to connect me to a pretty big and beautiful love light feeling that I had never felt before in my meditations, or with any of my previous guides. So my friends kept asking what his name was, which is normal.. But then some weird things kept popping up randomly each day.
In a span of one week I got several sign s, I got a random spam email with the subject heading “what is your name?” " or signing up for things I would get “We are missing some details and need your name”, then I got a random marketing advertising flyers in my letterbox with a heading of “what’s in a name?. So, when you notice synchronicities like that- my best advice to you is to trust- no better yet- assume it is a message and just take note of it. The more you notice things like that, the more it will happen! And so after a week of very strong messages from him asking me to ask his name- I sat in meditation and I asked. This is what he had said and what I had written down:
“Believe that I am here, do not always wait for me to come to you- you must meet me in the middle and reach out to me, I am here to help guide you. Believe in my presence, for belief is how you create. Source is the space between beliefs.”
Then he showed me him in a warrior type of outfit with a big shield and staff and shouted “Neo-wise!!!!!!” and laughed.
“Neo-wise??!!! ..What?!” I thought
Like as in the comet that’s passing by our Earth next week? Or Neo as in the bloody Matrix??? I was annoyed coz that’s all I had got, and to me it wasn’t clear and seemed like he was making a joke out of it! And then that week I realized he kind of was, he has a warped sense of humour I tell you that!
Anyways, the next day was interesting as there were a few separate instances in which the name Neo came up randomly. The first one was in the morning I had received an email from a digital marketing company offering their services, the title read “Intro to the right person on your team?” , the company’s name was Neo Financial and at the bottom in big bold letters was the business name logo: NEO. The next thing that had happened was that I was selling a pair of neoprene bikini’s on Ebay at the time, and I had gotten a message from someone asking if they were really neo. Neo??? I thought.. Then I realized she meant to say neoprene.. Hmmm ok- I think I’m getting the message. Then, later on that day I was sorting out tubs of fabric that I’d acquired that were stacked high when a tub landed on me that was marked “Neoprene mesh”.. Even funnier was I had acquired them from the TV show set called “The Magicians”.. Ok, another synchronicity.. Then finally later that night my husband had come home from work and told me how they had hired a new young guy at work, and that his name was Neo!! And how funny is it to actually meet someone named after Neo from the movie The Matrix.
Ok, geez!!! It was all so obvious, I get it- you want me to call you Neo! As you are wise (hence the Neo-wise comment earlier, insert hand to face emoji again) and you are here to teach me and everyone that we are all “the one” that can change and alter this Matrix world that we live in! That ultimately we can all consciously create in this new way… I told you he has a warped sense of humour!
Over the next month I basically spoke to him nearly every day- I didn’t have the distractions of my Spring Art Shows that I would usually be prepping for, and I also had to take things easy because of my concussion. And although I initially ignored his suggestions, after getting to know him I realized that I should probably take his business advice- and the one thing I am glad I acted on was buying a lot of fabric and jewelry supplies while I could, only as it turns out due to Covid and all of the lock downs, I couldn’t in fact get in many of my supplies I needed for that year!
He also would connect information to me, and that’s primarily how he continues to communicates with me. He’s a master at sending me exactly the right person, book, workshop, podcast, email etc. when I need it. He also had me diving back into all of my old books I’d collected and read over the years, primarily though he was sending me messages and connecting me to my old books on Quantum Physics and reminding me of how Quantum Physics ties into the world of spirituality and consciousness. He would mention how many more advancements in Quantum Physics will be made moving forward in this shift of consciousness that humanity is experiencing. Right on, I thought!!
Then one day in my meditation he told me I am to go back into the art of manifesting, I went on a crazy mission and pulled out all of my old books, it’s funny as I had collected many many books when I was working at The Oracle, as it was a time of my first ‘awakening’ in a sense, I would study everything and anything I could. Some of the books I pulled out were some I had never even read before, you know books that the Terri from 8 years ago had stumbled across randomly- like really old books and teachings from many decades ago from Neville Goddard, to Edgar Cayce.
I also pulled out all of my old journals, of meditations and channelings, and the many manifestation lists that I had made over the years. It was so fun, I flipped through and looked at all the items I had crossed off on my list that I had manifested- and in that moment I realized I forgot just how powerful of a manifester I was, and how I used to use the Law of Attraction (LOA) all the time! I realized that although I had used the LOA for attracting everything I needed and wanted for my business, and smaller little insignificant things, but I realized I had completely neglected using it in other areas of my life. In particular, to the bigger picture things in my life like manifesting a home or a family. This brought to light and uncovered some more limiting beliefs that I had around home and family.. Oh boy, I really was hiding away a lot more than I had realized!
In revisiting all of my old Law Of Attraction books, and by talking to my new guides, I realized I was denying a powerful part of me- all because I told myself that I wanted to live a more normal life. I had wanted a more normal life because I was done with all of the universe’s crazy antics and missions, and I didn’t want to be judged and ultimately rejected. I also had felt an intense pressure or burden that came with using my energetic gifts, I also didn’t want other people to feel uncomfortable by exposing this side of me. But with me sitting on the fence of both worlds like that, and fearing my own power and divinity, my full power and true potential in manifesting and creating was being diminished. I needed to accept who I was, and own it to fully unlock my power.
So after that realization I thought well maybe this was a clue as to why my new guide had come in. Maybe I wasn’t supposed to sit on the fence anymore, and deny this part of me..
It’s funny too as when I was going through my old journals, I also found a sheet of paper with a channeled message from a friend of mine who is a professional Channel at the metaphysical shop I worked at, who had channeled a message for me about 8 years earlier. I couldn’t believe it, this is exactly what I was facing now. Here’s what it says:
“The Large guide is to teach her about trust, to teach her about power. She longs to hear better, but sometimes she does not want to hear. For fear of something bad, she needs to know that safety is for her and that guidance comes to her to teach her about change and trust.”
Whoa, I thought, the large guide had arrived..
And so, finally he was here, the giant alchemist who had come now to remind me about my power.. about the law of attraction and being a conscious creator.. I had some limiting beliefs to work on!
And so over the last few months he has talked about many things, but mainly he was here to help remind me of who I am, of what I know in regards to the co-creating with the universe, and how I have been ignoring my power and that it was time for me to share more of this side of me. Errrr, ok I guess so.. As I spoke more and more to him, I decided I would start writing out what he had to say- here is a message from my guides that I had written down:
“Your stories serve to expand and guide not only you- on your path, but other’s too. For other’s are you. Not one person on Earth lives life without a journey in which lessons were learned, in which growth was achieved. This journey of ‘life’ on Earth transforms when the lessons are shared. This is the reminder of the ‘I am’. I am source, I am energy. And that is ‘we’ are all one consciousness. And so it is time for you to share, it’s time humanity remembers how to consciously create with intention, with focus. ”
Now I want to be real with you guys, all of this information that was coming to me came in bits and pieces and was shared with me over a period of about 3 or 4 months. And I know for some of you, this all sounds a little crazy- and I completely understand. Trust me, I am just a normal regular person like you and even I had times where I question what the heck is happening or going on with all of this. It can be awfully confusing, and in the past a lot of this information has been kept hidden But, more recently I’ve noticed a lot of that is changing and more and more people are coming out and sharing about this knowledge. Which is incredible exciting and powerful!
So, not only was my guide showing up in my meditations and sharing information in all sorts of ways, he also introduced me to and helped me to connect to an even higher energy that is of love and light. I wont go too much into this just yet, but basically I had an even bigger team of new guides than I originally thought!
And so, probably 2 or 3 times a week, I would connect with Neo and some pretty magical synchronicities were happening. So I started making note of them all, but not knowing what for. I Still hadn’t had clarity on how I would be sharing these stories and what that would look like. I’ve got to say, it was a pretty intense time as I don’t like being kept in the dark! I was obsessing over thoughts about ‘what was I going to do next? What creative project was I going to be starting? When will I know? How will I find out? I was so carried away with his exciting time of change- I was utterly consumed by it all!
It was all I could think or talk about, it came to a point though where all this intensity made me realize two things: the first thing being that I’d forgotten how passionate I was about this world of consciousness and spiritual development- and how exciting it truly is.
And two- how funny it was that my little Ego mind was so obsessed with the needing to know! Needing to know the how’s, when’s why’s where's. Needing to know if everything is going to be ok, needing to know what the next plan of action is! My poor Ego mind was just trying to control things, but if we always try to have control of things- then that stops the magic from coming in.
You see, my fleeting worrying thoughts were just my ego- and those thoughts were not in fact really me. I didn't need to worry or obsess over anything, I learnt that I was actually just fine being in the space of not knowing, as I was really enjoying the journey. The fears were just stemming from old looping fears of not being supported, or fears from lack. Once I remembered this, I let go of the attachments to needing to know, as only then would the answer come in due time and with much less effort! And so with that in mind, I decided to put my energy and focus onto what I wanted to manifest- which was the end result knowing what it is I am to do next.
So after an entire Summer of being sent on a wild goose chase of re-discovering myself and this world of conscious awareness, the message of starting the podcast finally came through. One morning I had woken up feeling pretty peaceful from a dream where I had been laying on the grass staring at the clouds. After a ten minute meditation laying in bed, I decided to check my phone for emails and Facebook messages and saw on a Facebook group that I follow that someone was sharing some of their favorite teachings and books they had read around consciousness and manifesting etc. I made note of the names as I’m always curious about different content and books that are out there. One of the names mentioned was William Whitecloud, hmm that’s funny I thought- thinking of the dream I had just had! So I decided to follow my intuition and look up his website to see what his books or teachings were all about. When looking on his site I saw that he taught workshops, and that he was moving them online and that one of his workshops was being offered for free. My ear rang and I heard my guides, “sign up!” I heard.
I saw that I had missed the sign up date by two days, “Sign up anyway!” I heard.
And so I did, not even knowing why or what it was about. I actually didn’t really think much of it at the time anyways, so was surprised when a week later I received an email stating there was room for me to join the online Zoom course.
And so I did! It started the very next day.
What was funny was, here I was joining up for the course and attending a zoom class in which I had absolutely no idea what the course was even on or about! I remember our zoom class leader asked us what our intentions were for the next 6 weeks from the course, we all had to read them out loud. I remember I said something along the lines of to “have fun and help change the world!”. Ha, insert hand to face emoji.. But really, that is what is at the base or foundation of a lot of things I do in my life- to have fun and to be a part of a positive shift forward for humanity.
Anyhow, what I found was the course was actually on everything I knew about focus and consciously creating your reality (surprise!). I laughed at my guides and the universe sending me the workshop. Alright, I get it! But towards the end of the workshop we focused more on finding and creating our destiny. Perfect, I thought. Maybe I’m getting closer to having an idea about what I can do with all of this magic that I know about? And I did!
During a meditation whilst in our group session, my guides came forward and showed me an image of me seated by a laptop, and talking into a microphone. I was busy writing down all that I saw and heard in this meditation as so much was coming through and was all very vivid. When I came out of the meditation I saw that I had written “Podcast” with circles around it!
What?! I thought.. nooo.. surely not? But as I will explain in later episodes about noticing signs and synchronicities, the signs I received thereafter were clearly pointing in that direction!
So there you go, my new guides were here to remind me that I was creating my reality, and that I needed to share my stories and processes through a bloody podcast.
Now, not only that- my guides also shared with me that the world will be experiencing a shift in consciousness and that this was already underway. This is something that I had in fact already read about, and that many people have been talking about for decades. So basically they told me and as I will share with you, is that we need to remember who we are, and remember that we have an innate creative power within all of us to create anything we desire, and that the entire world will be learning to create their reality in a ‘new way’- not just me. Geez, I thought- no biggie!!
I do want to go back in history to the last major shift in consciousness- this was during the scientific revolution. Sir Isaac Newton discovered his teachings-Newtonian physics, which is our general physics that we learn in high school, towards the end of the scientific revolution. The reason why this revolution happened is because around 300-400 years ago people got sick and tired of being superstitious and being suspicious and wanted to know more, and got curious about the world. This curiosity and sense for needing a new way of looking at the world happened because our consciousness evolved. Humanity started to understand the material world from a different point of view, and so we developed systems and order in the world that took the emphasis away from being victims to superstition, and things being seemingly out of our control. Instead, with our new found focus on Newtonian physics, society had more control over the world. We began to realize we have will, and that our will can effect or manipulate our material world. And as our consciousness evolved, so did our physical world as a result.
So now, we are in the midst of yet another evolution of consciousness- and where ultimately old structures and ways of doing things will change. We are beginning to realize that we in fact contribute to the cause, in the cause and effect paradigm, via our thoughts or beliefs. And if I’m going to be honest I’m going to say that we definitely are in need of a shift or change as I think we are all aware by now of the state that the Earth is in. With Climate change becoming more and more evident, I think we all have the realization more than ever that many things in our world need to change in order to correct the effects of climate change, and to ensure the longevity of human kind. And that this needs to start with our consciousness, as any action taken has always had a thought that came before it.
We have been blindly reacting and unconsciously taking actions in this world that have ultimately lead us to this point, in order to turn this ‘ship’ around, we must think differently in order to act differently, and take action with conscious intent. I think of Einstein’s famous quote “No problem can be solved by the same consciousness that created it”.
And that’s exactly what’s at the foundation or core of everything I want to share with you guys.
Consciousness tends to evolve when we learn or acquire new information. And the way we can evolve our consciousness is by opening up to acquiring new information and new or different ways of thinking. Which brings me to the fundamentals of the LOA- realizing that our thoughts and our focus ultimately become our reality.
Consciously creating our reality encourages you to be more aligned with higher vibrational states like happiness and joy- and who wouldn’t want more of that? And with more people living life that is aligned with higher vibrational states, that is more aligned with their passions and purpose, and where people awaken to their inner genius- then I can only imagine what better state our Earth and humanity would be in as a result. And that’s definitely something I want to be a part of helping to create.
Ultimately what I know and have experienced is that consciously co-creating with the universe is incredibly life changing, it’s a whole heap of fun and I have become a much better person and have a positive influence on this world because of it.
For me personally, I’ve always been interested and connected to any esoteric knowledge- I think because I was such an intuitive kid and had experienced some unexplainable things before so I wanted to learn more about what I had experienced. I realized through travelling and meeting so many people from all walks of life, that there are soo many people out there just like me, who also had experiences and had the same thirst for this knowledge and awareness. By truly owning who you really are then you can find your community or tribe of like minded people that accept and love you for your authentic self. I hope that by listening to the podcast that you too can find a sense of belonging, and a community.
We all have such different lives and come from all sorts of backgrounds, and by sharing our stories- what we have learnt and the tools and processes that helped to get us there, we can help others on their journey too. This was an art that was used by our ancestors for thousands of years, in all cultures, all around the world. Nowadays, we have become busier and busier, and somewhere along the way- particularly in the most recent years- we have gotten a little lost and subsequently forgotten the value of story time. And from what Neuro-science has shown us, we create mirror neurons in the brain when observing or hearing about or seeing other people and their actions. So these mirror neuron’s basically allow us to learn through imitation, and by hearing about these stories of how other people have achieved success, or their desired reality- then this is helping to teach your brain that yes- these things are possible and is sending that message to your subconscious.
But, my guides have come forth now to deliver the gentle and loving message that its time to remember, to remember the things you didn’t know you had forgotten. And so now in this amazing age of technology, it is easier more than ever now to connect to people from all around the world, to listen to each other’s stories and hear and learn from each other, from what we have learnt in our lives.
I hope that you find comfort and a sense of belonging while listening to this podcast, maybe it even lifts your vibrational state as we laugh at the wild adventures shared. Who knows, perhaps you will learn something new and inspire you to further pursue personal growth, to follow your passion or purpose on Earth. Perhaps this podcast and the tools you learn might inspire you to alchemize your life in some way, or encourage you on your journey of spiritual growth. As we all have the ability to tap into this energy, into this quantum realm of infinite possibilities.
Terri